Bored, tired, depressed

I passed the university test, and don’t know if this is just the aftermath of weeks of intense studying, or just the natural order of things for me but, as I could expect, my interest toward this blogging issue is inexorably dropped to the point now I feel like forcing myself to write, instead of writing because I want to. Generally, I feel tired, bored and unmotivated most of the time, with occasional bouts of depression.

So my guitar practicing routine is no more a practicing routine, and I just play random notes on the instrument for an hour or so until I get tired of that and stop, while my interest for fishing (one I thought I’d never lose) oscillates between obsession and indifference pretty quickly.

So I may have guessed right when I said my ability to get bored is growing with time, and I really don’t know what to do with that. Probably I’ll just start by asking my therapist what she thinks about this.

If things don’t get better, it’s unlikely for another post to follow. I’m not going to force myself writing here, and nobody is forcing me to do that, so there’s no reason for writing if I don’t feel like I want to.

Therapy: back

Actually I’ve been back since Wednsday, but Thursday I went fishing because I couln’t take it any more, the urge was too strong, as strong as the frustration from not being able to fish in that fantastic lake.

Yesterday I wasn’t in the right mood to write, so we have arrived to today and, as you may have guessed, the vacation has been somewhat disappointing.

Monday’s travel went fine, it was hot as hell on the road, but nothing I couldn’t tolerate (I’m much more sensible to cold temperatures). When arrived to the country inn, we unpocketed our stuff and spent some time in the pool, where I felt uncorfomtable due to the cold water and wind. Then we got ourselves a shower and traveled for about one hour to Montalcino, where we ate a pizza. Then we traveled for another hour or so to a lounge bar (yes, it’s not a typo! I went to a lounge bar! I wish Ozzy shall forgive me…) to drink a beer.
At that damned lounge bar the worst happened: our car broke and its owner, a friend of mine, lost for some minutes his wallet. When we found it, 150$ were missing.

We managed to get back to our inn without that car at around 5:00 am, but obviously the vacation has been ruined.

Thursday we had breakfast at 2:00 pm, then traveled for a couple of hours for swimming in a pool in one of our friend’s uncle villa, and then we got to this friend’s house to cook and eat T-bone steaks. That one was delicious indeed, but probably not worth all that hassle of a vacation.

Again we got back at around 5:00 am and got up at 8:00 am to take a train to get back at home, since our friend’s car was still broken. But as I guessed, while on the train our friends called to say they fixed the car, but obviously he wasn’t in the mood to go fishing.
The travel by train wasn’t bad, but I really coudn’t sleep, even if I badly needed to, so I wasn’t feeling very good.

Finally we came back home at 6:00 pm, and I immediately thrown myself on the couch and got some sleep.

Nothing much more to say about Thursday’s fishing session, it was calm and relaxing, but wasn’t enough to make up for the disappointment of not seeing with my eyes that lake.

This is more or less what I said to my therapist today, so that’s all for now, I got to get back studying.